I was looking for a new Christmas tradition. I chose Elf on the Shelf. It’s been fun on the days when we didn’t forget to do it until we were halfway to bed. On those days, it’s been a pain in the derrière.

We had a lot of fun with Elf on the Shelf in Week One. I realise now that this was because we had nothing better to do. By Week Two there were Christmas cards to write and presents to wrap to meet the final postal date to the UK. There were school concerts to attend and a Christmas Ball to stay up all night for. By Week Three there was a work do and a vomiting bug. As we go into Week Four, it’s all about present wrapping, drinks dos and a Christmas fair. Trying to organise what to do with a sodding elf hasn’t always been met with good Christmas cheer.

Does Goobie think Elf on the Shelf is real? We told him the elf comes alive when he’s not looking. I strongly suspect that Goobie has been humouring us. ‘Mummy and Daddy have been behaving oddly. They’ve been making a felt elf do stupid things that creates loads of mess for them to tidy up. And I have no idea why,’ I imagine him confiding to his bunny at night.

So, in case anyone’s struggling for ideas in the last few days until Christmas, here’s what Freddie the Elf’s been getting up to since Week One. I will update this post after Christmas with the last few days of Elf-pranking.

Day Eight

It was supposed to be snow spray, like it said on the tin, not gold spray paint. Thanks Jumbo. I still haven’t attempted to wash it off. The dining room looks like a squat.

Day Nine

Postal deadline looming. This was a quickie

Day Ten

I was unwell. This one was Matt’s – controversially spelling Freddie with a ‘y’.

Day 11

Christmas Ball day (and night). We’d planned ahead for this one. We’d bought an awesome video message from Santa via the Portable North Pole. Freddie the Elf delivered it to my iPad. Goobie LOVED it. And it was easy to set up while drunk.

Day 12

The day of the Hangover. Matt did this. It took approximately 30 seconds.

Day 13

I genuinely had fun with this one.

Day 14

I was out at a drinks do. This was Matt’s idea, hastily put together after he remembered on the way to bed that he’d forgotten to do it.

Days 15 & 16

Goobie was in bed all day on Day 15 with a vomiting bug. He was too sick to come downstairs to find Freddie. So Freddie was given an extra 24 hours to swig the brandy.

Day 17

Out at a work do. Quick idea for when you just want to get to bed.

Day 18

Totally forgot. Zero effort, but it took Goobie ages to find him!

Day 19

This is Goobie’s favourite. He found it hilarious. And it didn’t take as long to set up as it looks. We’ll be using scrunched-up loo paper for the rest of our lives I think.

Day 20

Well into Christmas-sack-sewing and present wrapping now. This was a quickie.

Day 21

Back very late from Christmas Fairyland in Nicosia. This was another quickie. Must do better tomorrow!

Just four more days to go! Thank god!