You can’t live in Cyprus and not have a night out in Ayia Napa. Last weekend I headed to Napa with a group of friends to find out what all the fuss is about.

We booked three rooms for one night at the Pavlinia Hotel, costing just €20 each. It wasn’t the Four Seasons, but it had a pool, the rooms were clean and it was within walking distance of the central clubbing strip.

Photos from our night in Ayia Napa are the worst I’m ever likely to put on this blog. I took my cheap camera, it was dark and the photos are as blurry as I was by the end!

We started the night with a meal at the AMAZING Hokkaido Japanese restaurant. Eating there is a unique experience. You sit at a big C-shaped table that surrounds a cooking area. While we drank cocktails (try the lychee and the Geisha ones -deeelish!), two chefs started cooking our food. And wowzers, what a show they put on!  Think Tom Cruise from Cocktail but with spatulas and eggs. They were like some juggling percussion band! The climax of the show was a massive fireball made out of the cooking oil used to make a 3ft cobra omelette!  

From the restaurant we took a five-minute walk to the main strip. It was only 10.30pm so the clubs were still shut (they don’t open until gone midnight). But this didn’t matter because there were numerous bars with mini dance floors to get people in the mood. Our first stop was Senior Frog’s, which was rammed but had a great atmosphere. The bar staff were doing a dance routine to Agadoo and the Birdy Song. We did the conga round the bar and out onto the street. Just as my ears were starting to bleed from the 80s crap, the music switched to Latin dance – fabulous! We danced until it got too crowded, then moved on.  

It quickly became apparent that this was no Ibiza. I loved my hen weekend in Ibiza a few years ago. It was great dressing up and going to Pacha and Space. It was more glamorous, more pretentious and more expensive than Napa. It was more serious about dance. Ayia Napa surprised me by how laid-back it was. I shouldn’t have been surprised because Cyprus is a laid-back country. It was just about having fun, not about being cool – I mean, some of the bars looked like the entrance to an amusement park. People of all ages were drinking in and outside the bars, dancing on tables and podiums. And it seemed you could wear whatever you liked. I saw people in shorts, flip-flops and trainers.

My favourite place of the night was Aruba. It was empty when we got there and the dance floor was the right size for a group of ten women to spread out and have fun. There was a pole that we had a go on. I looked like I was having a Bridget Jones moment.

The music was awesome; a mix of R&B and dance. I started to lose myself at this point. I love dance music and there are some trance and house tracks that feel almost transformative. You don’t even have to be good at dancing. It doesn’t matter because the music wraps itself around you and it feels like it’s going to take you to a higher dimension. It’s an amazing feeling. I don’t know how long we danced but the music filled me with so much energy – it was euphoric. At some point a few of us joined one of the bar’s dancers on a table outside and I remember thinking I don’t give a shit how I look. Which is just as well really.  

We moved on and I ran up to a massive Fred Flintstone for a selfie.

‘OMG, you’re vibrating!’ I said to Fred.

‘It’s the air conditioning in here,’ came a distant voice inside the Flintstone suit.

Fred was from the Bedrock Cafe. I’d eaten lunch there with Goobie and Matt last year. Goobie had sat in the Flintstone car.  It was surreal seeing it at night with dancers on the tables.

We went on to Ayia Napa Square, collecting free entrance tickets to Castle and Carwash as we went. You can negotiate free drinks before you go in. Apart from the meal, I spent less than €10 the whole night. We ended up at the Ambassaden, a bar/club on the corner of the Square. The dance floor inside was small and crowded so we found a table outside and, as if by magic, a long tray containing 10 rainbow-coloured shots appeared (I found out afterwards that my friend had negotiated for them when we’d arrived). This place had the best music, a real eclectic mix of R&B, pop and dance that appealed to all tastes. We danced in the street, on the chairs, tables, in the queue for the loos, you name it.

It was now well past midnight and the big clubs had opened. I’d wanted to go to Castle where I’d hoped I’d have my house moment, but everyone fancied Carwash. I guess you can’t go to the dance capital of Cyprus and escape 80s-shite all night, right? I thought about going to Castle on my own, like I would the dance tent at Glasto, but I didn’t think it would be as safe. So I figured since I’d already been dancing for hours to some great music, I could stomach a bit of 80s.

Carwash actually had a surprisingly good atmosphere and I danced my way through Smooth Criminal. But then I discovered they played something worse than 80s. They played 70s. And – prepare yourselves – some 60s. I legged it.

I got to bed at 4am, earlier than expected, but then we’d started dancing earlier than expected too. It was a fun night out with some fabulous people. And not getting to Castle gives me an excuse to go again.  

The next morning we nursed our hangovers at Ayia Napa’s other famous landmark – Nissi Beach. It was rammed but I didn’t care. The cool clear sea did wonders for my head before I drove, slowly, home.