The Mermaid Cruise – a two-hour children’s adventure on the sea. With the help of pirate Billy Bones and Tinkerbell, will the children find the mermaids and get to swim with them? And will Goobie have his question answered?

The Mermaid Cruise leaves at 5pm from Protaras pier on the eastern coast of the island. We booked our tickets in advance and collected them from the ticket office next to the pier. Adults cost €25, children €15, under 2s free.

Goobie and his friends excitedly piled onto the boat, the adults trailing behind with the bags. We soon set sail south along the coast, passing Protaras and Konnos Bay, the wind snatching the hats from our heads.

On the voyage, the children were entertained by Billy Bones and Tinkerbell, playing games and doing a treasure hunt – something I thought impossible on a boat, without drownings. But somehow Billy Bones managed it and the children had a lot of fun. Snacks (included in the price) were passed around and the adults bought drinks from the kiosk on the boat.

Many of the children queued to have their faces painted. Apparently there was a ticket system so the children could have fun while they waited for their number to be called. But lots of children didn’t know that and queued for much of the trip, only to be told when they reached the front that they didn’t have the right number.

The boat continued on down the coast, passing a wedding in a cliff-edge church and waving at party boats as they roared past. Eventually we reached the bay where the mermaids lived. For me, this was the only disappointment of the cruise. I’d expected a secluded, empty bay, but it was packed with sightseeing boats and tourists on the shore. It put a dent in the fantasy bubble that Billy Bones and Tinkerbell had created on the journey there. But none of the children cared, so that was all that mattered.

Suddenly, a child screamed out, ‘There they are! The mermaids!!’

Two heads were bobbing just above the water in front of the boat.

‘Are they real, Mummy?’ Goobie asked.

‘Ummmm,’ I said. ‘What do you think?’

‘Definitely.’

In a flurry of excitement, everyone raced to the far end of the boat, where they were helped into life jackets and climbed down a ladder into the sea. We’d bought Herc the smallest life jacket we could find but something wasn’t quite right about it . . ..

The water was too deep to risk taking Herc in, so Goobie jumped in on his own, a big grin on his face as he swam up to the mermaids.

But I felt bad for him as all the other children had their parents with them. And then a kind 60-something lady spotted our problem and offered to look after Herc while I swam with Goobie. ‘Don’t worry,’ she said. ‘I’ve been there, I know what it’s like.’ A real tonic to my recent Misery in My Mall.

I was hot and the sea was so blue and inviting. I jumped in eagerly and swam over to Goobie. He was so excited.

‘That’s Luna and that’s Coral,’ he said, looking at the two beautiful mermaids in awe.

After a while swimming with the children, the mermaids somehow climbed onto the boat (I missed that bit!) and the children lined up to have photos with them. They were there a long time so there was no rush – though try telling a load of excited children that!

Finally it was time to wave goodbye to the mermaids and the boat turned round to head back to Protaras. On the way, we were given a mini sightseeing tour of the caves we passed and the famous Kamara tou Koraka natural bridge.

The fun wasn’t over for the children. They were invited up to the top deck for a mini disco. Billy Bones kept them entertained, holding a floss competition – which Goobie won! He was very proud of himself. He’s spent months practicing the floss.

Eventually we made it back to Protaras and disembarked with a group of happy, tired children. Goobie’s not usually into mermaids, but he had a great time. It was well-organised on the whole and the crew were great with the children.

Goobie still talks about Luna and Coral. The day he met two real mermaids.